- May 21, 2021
- Divorce
All of us understand that a divorce is time-consuming and stressful. Unfortunately, many divorces are fraught with unnecessary conflict between spouses. Too often, somebody in the marriage is determined to fight it out, no matter what. When the other party is making things difficult for you, a divorce lawyer in Boise is the best ally. These are some suggestions for making it through a high-conflict divorce.
Minimize Contact with Your Spouse
A high-conflict person thrives on attention, and it is your responsibility to deprive him or her of it. As much as you can, limit your contact with the other party. Remember that you will most likely need to communicate with your partner to some degree, especially if kids are involved. There may also be provisions of court orders on your case that require some degree of communication.
But having a Boise Family Law Attorney can limit your spouse’s contact with you — and thereby reduce headaches. If you have to have communications directly with your spouse, try to do so in writing. This may also help create a document in your case that could later prove useful.
Don’t React to Provocations
When the other person says something untrue, hurtful, or insulting, it’s easy to become angry. But your spouse probably knows which buttons to push, so this is most likely deliberate. Reacting may lead to you doing or saying something that may be used against you later.
Protect Your Interests
In high-conflict divorces, reasoning with the other party is difficult if not impossible. You likely will not be able to make them see things from your perspective. The only party in the divorce which you can control is yourself. Make peace with this and allow your family law attorney do his or her job.
Establish Boundaries
Early in the divorce process, you need to let the other partner know what you will and won’t discuss. Additionally, it is important to consistently maintain those boundaries. High-conflict persons look for any opening they can find to discuss something which will cause trouble. Walk away from another person in case your boundaries aren’t respected.
Leave the Kids Out of It
Whether custody is involved or not, some people routinely attempt to weaponize their children against the other party. High-conflict spouses sometimes use children as leverage, or to get information from the other party. You will need to remain above this and insist that this conduct not occur. Notify your divorce attorney if the other spouse is involving your children in the divorce.
If Needed, Call the Police
Too frequently, high-conflict people cross the line from obnoxious behavior into criminal territory. Stalking, threats, and similar activities are not acceptable. If possible, record the action that you believe violates the law. In the event you or your kids are facing physical violence or threats, let your Boise, Idaho family law attorney know immediately. Also, inform your divorce attorney about any instances of defamation and other types of harassment.
Make the Most of Support Networks
Church, family, and friends can provide support when you need it most. Rather than blow up at another party (which is counterproductive), rely on your own network to listen to your frustrations. Divorce can be emotionally scarring to anyone.
Contact Boise Family Law Today for Help with a High Conflict Divorce
No one deserves to have to deal with someone intent on making divorce unnecessarily painful. Maintaining perspective and giving thoughtful consideration to the issues you experience will help the procedure go more smoothly. For more information tips for defusing conflict and to get the legal counsel you need, call Boise Family Law. Our team is prepared to work with you through these difficult times.